☼FEAR ☼ANGER ☼SHOCK ☼SHAME
☼DISGUST ☼SADNESS ☼GUILT ☼CURIOSITY
☼COMPASSION ☼LOVE ☼JOY ☼GRATITUDE
Which of these emotions are good or bad OR positive or negative?
What makes then positive or negative, good or bad?
WHICH OF THESE 'STORIES' ABOUT EMOTION ARE TRUE FOR YOU?
*Anger, guilt, shame, fear, sadness & embarrassment and anxiety are
negative emotions
*Negative emotions are bad, dangerous, irrational & a sign of weakness
*Negative emotions mean I am psychologically defective
*Negative emotions will damage my health
*People should hide their feelings
*Expressing feelings is a sign of weakness
*Strong emotions mean I am out of control
*Women shouldn't show anger
*Men shouldn't show fear
*I must keep my emotions in tight control
*If I don't control my emotions, something bad will happen
*Negative emotions mean there is something wrong with my life
Where did those stories come from?
This was particularly interesting to me the topic of 'Emotions'. You might remember reading back I had no idea what this one would entail mostly because I do find it very easy to express myself. Really interesting..
I naturally said the words in the first 2 lines were all negative words and the last line were positive workds..right? No, wrong actually..
Fear is what our body alerts us to when something that's not good is about to happen..so it keeps us safe (tick!)
Anger is our internal 'alert' when something is not right also...
Shock is there to protect us ..
Shame...to be honest I can't remember this one I will have to ask again tomorrow..
So basically, negative words are there to help us, not be taken in the context to which they actually are..
Out of those options of which 'stories' about emotion are true for me would have to be...
**Anger, guilt, shame, fear, sadness & embarrasment and anxiety are negative emotions**....
But I now know they are not..
What was your childhood programming?
(Edited to simplify this)
******************************************
As you were growing up, what messages were given about emotions?
Anger (which was directed at her)What were you told about the best way to handle your emotions?
I wasn't told or hardly 'taught' anything, what I learnt was either from other people or I figured it out myself.
What emotions did your family freely express?
Anger & then happiness when it suited or when others were around.
What emotions did your family suppress or frown upon?
Loyalty to my Dad
How did the adults in your family handle their negative emotions?
Openly and with alcohol
What emotional control strategies did they use?
Yelling & screaming, reversing situations to make you feel like the guilty/wrong one
How did the adults in your family react to your negative emotions?
I was told to be quiet and to respect my Mother. One day that stands out was the day I confronted her about my parents breaking up . I'd found from family members of her own that she cheated on Dad & then I was told that I was wrong and how awful to upset my own mother like that & how could I hurt her
What did you learn by observing all this as you grew up?
To not repeat the way that I was parented. Or not parented really. Not to repeat those mistakes I watched the adults around me making.
As a result of this programming, what ideas are you still carrying around today about your emotions and how to handle them?
I think that if there is an issue with anything it's better to address it and deal with it in an amicable way. There is no point sweeping things under the rug, they're still there they're still unresolved issues.
If I feel happy I express it, if I feel angry I let it out too but I try not to hurt people and if I do I apologize rather than be a stick in the mud . Try to be the bigger person & see my own downfalls & know I do make mistakes & that is ok. So long as you learn from them. I'm not perfect and never will be nor never want to be but its better to admit when you are wrong in a situation instead of just not ever saying 'sorry' which is one thing my Mother will never or has to this point done.
☼DISGUST ☼SADNESS ☼GUILT ☼CURIOSITY
☼COMPASSION ☼LOVE ☼JOY ☼GRATITUDE
Which of these emotions are good or bad OR positive or negative?
What makes then positive or negative, good or bad?
WHICH OF THESE 'STORIES' ABOUT EMOTION ARE TRUE FOR YOU?
*Anger, guilt, shame, fear, sadness & embarrassment and anxiety are
negative emotions
*Negative emotions are bad, dangerous, irrational & a sign of weakness
*Negative emotions mean I am psychologically defective
*Negative emotions will damage my health
*People should hide their feelings
*Expressing feelings is a sign of weakness
*Strong emotions mean I am out of control
*Women shouldn't show anger
*Men shouldn't show fear
*I must keep my emotions in tight control
*If I don't control my emotions, something bad will happen
*Negative emotions mean there is something wrong with my life
Where did those stories come from?
This was particularly interesting to me the topic of 'Emotions'. You might remember reading back I had no idea what this one would entail mostly because I do find it very easy to express myself. Really interesting..
I naturally said the words in the first 2 lines were all negative words and the last line were positive workds..right? No, wrong actually..
Fear is what our body alerts us to when something that's not good is about to happen..so it keeps us safe (tick!)
Anger is our internal 'alert' when something is not right also...
Shock is there to protect us ..
Shame...to be honest I can't remember this one I will have to ask again tomorrow..
So basically, negative words are there to help us, not be taken in the context to which they actually are..
Out of those options of which 'stories' about emotion are true for me would have to be...
But I now know they are not..
What was your childhood programming?
(Edited to simplify this)
******************************************
As you were growing up, what messages were given about emotions?
This was one thing that my Mother did do right, she displayed a broad spectrum of emotions.
Which emotions were you told were desirable or undesirable?Anger (which was directed at her)What were you told about the best way to handle your emotions?
I wasn't told or hardly 'taught' anything, what I learnt was either from other people or I figured it out myself.
What emotions did your family freely express?
Anger & then happiness when it suited or when others were around.
What emotions did your family suppress or frown upon?
Loyalty to my Dad
How did the adults in your family handle their negative emotions?
Openly and with alcohol
What emotional control strategies did they use?
Yelling & screaming, reversing situations to make you feel like the guilty/wrong one
How did the adults in your family react to your negative emotions?
I was told to be quiet and to respect my Mother. One day that stands out was the day I confronted her about my parents breaking up . I'd found from family members of her own that she cheated on Dad & then I was told that I was wrong and how awful to upset my own mother like that & how could I hurt her
What did you learn by observing all this as you grew up?
To not repeat the way that I was parented. Or not parented really. Not to repeat those mistakes I watched the adults around me making.
As a result of this programming, what ideas are you still carrying around today about your emotions and how to handle them?
I think that if there is an issue with anything it's better to address it and deal with it in an amicable way. There is no point sweeping things under the rug, they're still there they're still unresolved issues.
If I feel happy I express it, if I feel angry I let it out too but I try not to hurt people and if I do I apologize rather than be a stick in the mud . Try to be the bigger person & see my own downfalls & know I do make mistakes & that is ok. So long as you learn from them. I'm not perfect and never will be nor never want to be but its better to admit when you are wrong in a situation instead of just not ever saying 'sorry' which is one thing my Mother will never or has to this point done.
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