Blogging hiatus

A lot has happened in the past month & I've not felt like blogging, which is why I haven't. I will for now keep it short & sweet...


I've spent some time with my sister, she stayed over & we had a great time watching the sunrise, shopping..and watching her ride her bike we all pitched in for and bought for her as a surprise....

I've cried more times than I can remember and I've also smiled. I gotta just remember that..☼

I've asked God to help me because I can't do this on my own. We've been to church 2times.

I have talked to my Dad lots, friends have been an amazing support when i need them, hence me not really blogging i tend to make private hidden posts and then delete them, it's the instant posting of facebook that I have needed to vent, to ask questions to let the pent up emotions out.

I booked a pap smear finally after 10 years of waiting, why did I wait? I can't answer that. I went in a week & a half ago. I get my results tomorrow.

Lots more has happened but there's been a lot in a short time and I simply can't remember anything else. I haven't been to my psychologist appointments for maybe 5 weeks? She went on holidays, that's alright because I learnt to deal with some pretty strong emotions and I did it on my own.. i go back this tuesday..and that's another thing..medicare say I only have 3 appointments left for the year that i can claim..I will pay for what I need then & claim nothing back.

I'm going to see my sister again I hope in the next couple of weeks, she is starting her chemotherapy up here which I know I am happy about because it means It will make it a heck of a lot easier for me to take her to and from appointments if she wants me to and to drop her off some dinners.. she's basically around the corner now. She is about to start some heavy duty chemo but this time I will be able to support her which is also going to make it real, when you've not been seeing it it's easy to not realize the enormity of a situation.

My heart is hurting and I allow it to open and the pain pours out, then you start all over again until the next time that it becomes too much again. I don't know what is going to happen, I'm in 2 minds & I go from one to the other and it's often a few times in one day.

That is about all for now♥ stay safe & take care xoxox